Divorce can be a difficult process, but if you are in an abusive relationship, it may be a necessary one. Unfortunately, abusive relationships often involve manipulation, and sometimes the person who is being abused does not realize they are a victim. Those who are experiencing difficulties in their relationship should be sure to recognize the signs of abuse and learn about their options for escaping an abusive situation.

What Defines an Abusive Relationship?

Not all abusive relationships are physically violent. These relationships typically involve one partner taking control or power over the other. This control can be expressed through physical violence, verbal abuse, and/or manipulative behavior. Mind games, threats, gaslighting, coercion, and intimidation are all common traits of manipulative behavior. Domestic violence can result in physical harm to a spouse or their children, but abuse can cause a great deal of emotional and psychological harm as well.

Marriages end for a variety of different reasons, and divorce sometimes occurs because personalities clash and the relationship can no longer survive. In some cases, spouses may be able to work out their differences and end their marriage amicably, but if your ex-partner is a narcissist, you may face challenges in the divorce process.

Narcissism is a mental condition in which someone has a higher than average ego, a need for validation, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others. Narcissistic people often have very low self-esteem and are sensitive to the tiniest criticisms. If you are planning to end your relationship with a narcissistic spouse, the following tips can help you prepare for the difficulties you may face:

Assemble a Strong Support System

Narcissists are good at charming people and winning them over. During the divorce process, your ex-spouse may attempt to get friends and family members on their side and turn them against you. If you are considering ending your marriage, you should tell people you trust about your plans and, if necessary, share the reasons why your relationship has broken down. This way, if your ex-partner tries to convince them of a different story, they will know the truth. In addition, these people can offer you much-needed support as you deal with the stress of ending your relationship.

While many people think that all divorces are hostile and aggressive, couples are often able to work together to end their marriage in an amicable manner. Here in the United States, divorce mediation is a commonly used strategy to negotiate a divorce settlement. Mediation is a process in which you and your spouse work with your attorneys and a third-party mediator to resolve the outstanding issues surrounding your divorce. If you believe that mediation is the right decision for you and your family, speak with your legal team regarding your options moving forward. 

The Role of the Mediator 

Many people disregard the option of mediation due to misconceptions they have related to the role of the mediator. During mediation, the mediator will assist you and your spouse through discussions and conflict resolution. It is important to note that the mediator will not make decisions for you and your spouse but will instead work to help you resolve issues in a mutually beneficial manner. Once an agreement has been reached between the two parties, the final agreement will be presented to the judge for approval. 

The Benefits of Mediation 

There are many positive aspects of pursuing mediation. It can expedite the divorce process, save you money, and develop a foundation for you and your spouse to establish a new relationship moving forward. Even more beneficial is the manner in which mediation can impact the nuanced aspects of your divorce. When it comes to financial issues, mediation can allow both parties to reach an agreement that will allow you to meet your ongoing needs. If children are involved, parents can work to reach an amicable child custody agreement that will ensure that the children can maintain a relationship with both parties. If you and your spouse are interested in pursuing mediation, we would be happy to answer any questions you may have about the process. 

Here in the United States, an average of 20 people are physically abused by a spouse or intimate partner every minute. That means that every single year, an estimated 10 million Americans face some form of domestic abuse. The impact of domestic violence goes far beyond the initial injuries inflicted. Victims can face severe post-traumatic stress, anxiety, and even thoughts of self-harm. Fortunately, a dedicated legal team can help you remove yourself from an unhealthy and dangerous situation. 

What We Can Do 

According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), approximately 25% of American women face some form of domestic violence from an intimate partner. In many cases, domestic abuse from a spouse or partner can escalate into severe or even fatal injuries. By working with a dedicated, compassionate legal team, you can ensure the safety of you and your family. Our attorneys can help with:

• Establishing Orders of Protection: In cases of domestic abuse, your safety is our top priority. The first step we can take is obtaining an order of protection for you and your family. A restraining order can force your abuser to leave a shared residency and end any and all contact with you and your children. A temporary restraining order can be established simply through the account of the petitioner (the victim). Our team can provide you with representation in court hearings to ensure that permanent protections are put into place. 
• A Speedy Divorce: When separating from an abusive spouse, a divorce can represent an opportunity to move forward. We understand the sensitive nature of these situations, and our team is prepared to expedite the divorce process. Here in the state of Illinois, there are over 100,000 reported cases of domestic violence each year. Separating from a violent spouse can be the best option for you and your family, and our firm is here to help. 
• Ensuring Sole Custody: Roughly 1 in 15 American children are witnesses to domestic violence each year. Removing your children from a harmful situation can be critically important to their development. Children that witness domestic violence are more likely to struggle academically and face other emotional challenges. Securing sole custody can ensure that your children will no longer have to be a part of a violent situation. Our team is prepared to aggressively represent you and ensure that your children’s safety is protected. 

Contact a Wheaton Order of Protection Lawyer 

At The Stogsdill Law Firm, P.C., our legal team has extensive experience dealing with issues of domestic violence. We are dedicated to handling the difficulties of a violent relationship with the care that our clients deserve. Through expediting the divorce process, helping you gain custody of your children, or obtaining orders of protection, our team is here to help you and your family. To schedule a consultation with a DuPage County family law attorney, call our office today at 630-462-9500. 

Parents tend to believe that they have a "right" to see and spend time with their child, but this is not always true. In fact, there are situations in which a parent can lose their parenting time or have it restricted. If you are in the midst of a child-related issue and believe that your child needs protecting, or are facing potential restriction of your parenting time, the following information can help you better understand when and why parenting time might be restricted.

Two Parents Are Typically Considered Beneficial

In most divorces and child-related cases, the presence of both parents is considered optimal. This does not mean that each parent receives equal parenting time, but it does mean that the courts tend to acknowledge that each parent has something unique to contribute to the life of the child. Further, children are typically better adjusted when they have two loving and involved parents. Yet there are situations in which a parent may pose a risk to a child. In these situations, two regularly and unrestricted parents may be considered a less favorable option.